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The adage that you never get a second chance to make a good first impression is doubly true for online dating!

The quality of your online conversation starters can really impact the chances of a new relationship getting off the ground. EliteSingles sat down with international relationship expert Sami Wunder to get her top tips for composing attention-grabbing, connection-inducing first messages that can get things moving forward. She shared her top 6 tips for influential online conversation starters. Tip 1. Only initiate conversations with people you are genuinely interested in meeting.

15 conversation starters on bumble that dating experts swear by

Instead, good conversation starters on dating sites selective and invest your energy only in those matches that appeal to you quality over quantity. You will be successful if you always keep a balance and stay open with all possible matches. Tip 2. Try to ascertain if there is something the two of you share — a hobby, a love for dogs, a place you have both visited in the past. If yes, this can be one of the best online conversation starters because it shows you made the effort to review their profile and are able to point out a shared likeness.

However, if there is nothing in common that you can immediately talk about, go the opposite way and ask about something in their story, profile, or pictures that is completely foreign to you or something that you find intriguing or you would like to try. On a related note, when writing your own profile, make sure to include such possible online conversation starters in there, to make it easier for people reading your profile to connect with you.

Include your passions, be as specific as you can and paint a vivid picture of your life, rather than just listing likes and dislikes. Tip 3. Use the information you picked in the step and compose a personal message in which the person you are sending can relate to.

Keep it short, but long enough to be meaningful. End your message with a question or hook, to give your potential date an opportunity to reply.

6 expert online conversation starters

This not only keeps the conversation going, but it might also lead them to reveal more about themselves. You might find me strolling through the MoMA on a Saturday evening, or exploring some indie new gallery somewhere in Brooklyn. Tip 4. Remember to talk and act like the educated, successful, elite person you are.

The 12 best conversation starters to use on dating apps in the new year

Having a more formal tone is the way to go. It shows laziness and it throws the onus of finding something interesting to talk about on the addressee — and if that person is in high demand and receives many messages every single day, the probability of them even replying to your single-word message becomes very low. Needless to say, vulgarities, innuendo, or sexual compliments should not be included in a very first message.

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Tip 5. Always remember to check grammar, spelling and punctuation. Interestingly, women seemed to display stronger feelings about grammar than men — so it pays to double-check that message, gentlemen! Tip 6. Women, too, should absolutely start conversations online.

17 online dating conversation starters that just work

I am a proponent of polarity in romantic relationshipsbut, online dating is the place where I do teach women to make the first step and initiate a conversation with men! The reason for this is simple: in general, men receive far fewer messages than women do, so making the first step is a sure way to stand out.

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Secondly, the fact that you sent that first message does not mean you have to assume the leading role going forward. On the contrary, it can be the virtual equivalent of making eye contact and smiling at a stranger in a crowded room — an invitation to come closer and find out more about you. Finally, my last recommendation, for both men and women, is to remember to bring in the energy of fun and playfulness into your messages!

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Authentic, light and personalized messages are the best way to get things going online. Happy dating! Sami Wunder is a leading international love, dating and relationship expert.

Sami is an author, wife and mother. For more info, visit her website. Not sure whether you're ready to start dating again?

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10 online dating conversation starters that will get her to respond

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